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His older brother (4yrs old) just gave up the nap and now wants his baby brother to stay awake too so they can play! Baby brother needs a nap in a big way everyday (and so does Mommy!) because he wakes several times during the night and then gets up at 5:00 AM everyday. (so does Mommy, Daddy and big bro!) I am so exhausted! I know this is all my fault because I have not allowed him to learn how to soothe himself to sleep. He is exclusively breastfed and never took to a bottle or pacifier (he drinks from a sippy cup now as well as nurses). Does anyone have any really good advice for me? I am at the end of my rope. I am listening to him cry now for over 45 mnutes and it is killing me! Any ideas how I can get him to sleep without my help? Sometimes I can’t even put him down and end up holding him while he sleeps (or wearing him in a sling). How long do I let him cry?
Are you staying in the room with him or are you leaving completely? My 14 month old has always been a fantastic sleeper - since he was about 4 months old we could put him down and he would fall asleep by himself (we learnt the hard way with our first child and decided this time would be different), but just recently he has started to suffer with separation anxiety and he hates it when I put him down. So, what I do is I put him in his cot, stroke his head and leave the room. When he cries (which is immediately), I go back in, lie him down again and then leave. No eye contact and just very gentle. This can go on for quite a while, but as long as you do not pick him up from his cot again, he will eventually go to sleep. The idea is that as long as they know you will return, they will go to sleep and if you keep this up, every night/nap will get easier. Sometimes I can’t bear to hear him cry and I will lie down next to him - it is a little different for me because I know that it isn’t because he doesn’t want to sleep, he just wants me to be there (because when I lie in the bed next to his cot, he immediately relaxes and goes to sleep). So, maybe you could try that to start off with and then slowly start moving away from the cot (so that he can still see you), until you are out of the room. The thing is that it is very hard to “retrain” a 15 month old that has never been taught how to soothe himself. I am not a believer in CIO (in that actually leaving them alone in their room to cry), but I think that the modified version I use works and they are not left to scream their heart out for hours!